It's been over twenty months since I've arrived in Thailand. It's amazing to think of how far I've come, how I've adopted the language and adapted to the culture, how the little rural village in Isaan has become my community and my home, and how the people here have become my family and my friends. What started as an adventure has become my life.
As my time here is winding down, I realize more and more that there are so many aspects of this lifestyle that I've become accustomed to seeing, doing, and dealing with that will be no more when I get to the other side. Here are a few examples (I originally had fifteen, then cut it down to ten, then decided to publish in three parts for readability)
1. Removing Shoes... It is standard Thai etiquette to remove shoes before entering a building, most specifically temples and homes. I’ve heard something to the effect of spirits living in the soil that should be left outside. It is common to remove shoes before entering some shops and offices, and children remove their shoes before entering the classroom. Even the U.S. Peace Corps office in Bangkok follows the no-shoes custom. When I first came to Thailand, I thought that this meant that I'd have to keep my feet presentable i.e. pedicured all the time, but on the contrary, barefeet are so commonplace, that nobody really pays any mind to what their toes look like. Even so, I still take personal pleasure in treating myself to a regular pedicures. Coming from a place where many see this barefoot practice as "earthy" or even unsanitary, I've come to see the practicality of leaving the dirt outside, and I can see myself continuing this practice, or at least a variation of leaving shoes at the door, when I have my own place again.
| Similar signs can be found just about everywhere |
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| My students stretch their toes as they do their work |
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Students all wear the same shoes!
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| In the temple, no shoes allowed. |
2. Wai… This gesture of putting hands together (like prayer hands) and lifting them is used in greeting and farewell, and also to show respect and gratitude. There are different forms of wai, a wai is usually done with a bowed head. The degree to which the hands are raised and the head is bowed varies across situations. Typically, the person with lower social ranking makes the first wai, sometimes the superior or senior person would not wai in return, but may nod and maybe smile in acknowledgement, likewise, it is usually not necessary or expected for adults to return a wai to children. A wai is sometimes used in meetings when a person wishes to be excused from a room or reenters the room, this individual will wai before making his exit or before returning to his seat. People also wai to show respect to religious symbols (artifacts, images, temples, statues, shrines, and other structures), it is not uncommon to hear drivers honk in lieu of a wai when passing shrines on the side of the road, and I certainly have seen drivers do single handed, and even double handed wais when passing temples. Because I am a foreigner, a lot of people, children especially, are happy to wave to me and shake my hands in greeting, it's like a mini cultural exchange exercise. I always wai in formal settings, when meeting someone for the first time, and to show respect to individuals of high social ranking, but there are times when I opt to exercise the liberty of being a foreigner and just smile and wave.
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| Students Wai Teachers on Teacher Appreciation Day, which is actually called Wan Wai Kru (Day to Wai the Teacher) |
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| Wai-ing with friends at a temple that we visited on a recent retreat also note our bare feet! |
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| Wai-ing with friends and dinosaurs |
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| Even Ronald Wais in Thailand! |
3. Affection… In rural Thailand, it is rare to see men and women, even married couples, showing affection, even holding hands, whether in public or in the presence of others in their own homes. I, myself, am not big on PDA (public displays of affection), but the complete absence of it between couples struck me as as interesting. Even more interesting is how much more common it is to see closeness and affection being displayed within gender groups, especially among men and boys. By affection, I’m referring to hugs, hand holding, arm over shoulder, head lean on shoulder, playful physical contact, and the sort (non-sexual contact) and not the prevalence of ladyboys. I've observed that boys and men, regardless to age or orientation, are comfortable being brotherly and playful without physical aggression or competition, which is quite different to my observations of typical male socialization in American cultures.
Isn't it interesting how displays of love and respect vary across cultures? See the short video below for other snippets and observations of my everyday life.
To Be Continued!
Part 2
Part 3
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